WHO AM I? - WHAT IS MY PURPOSE?

Jen, a friend suggested a book, “Strengthen yourself in the Lord by Bill Johnson. In the opening endorsements a statement was made by Dr. Mahesh Chavda about the book, “I have discovered that people, whatever their background, have two primary questions: “Who am I?” and “What is my purpose?” Before reading what Bill Johnson has to say my mind is challenged and starts to work. We always relate to where we have come from, where we are and where we believe we are headed.
Who am I? What has been my identity over the years?
When I was young I was the daughter of…………
When I got married I was the wife of…..
When I was the church pianist at....
When I was on a pastoral team….

When I served as President of an international women’s organization…
When I was their state Intercessor.

When a person would ask, “Do you know Margaret”? Their answer usually would be, ‘Oh yes, she is……’

I have found in my life that when I was at the end of a season of ministry there was an empty feeling, a feeling of ‘who am I really’…’Where do I fit?' You say that should not happen but what you do not acknowledge you can do nothing about. So many times we get lost and have our identity in where we are serving. Ministry to me is an outflow of who I am and I had always found such joy in serving in those capacities. A long season was about to take place for ministry and I had to realize that ‘who I was’ was not in past ministry but it was my character, the person who resides inside. The person I am in the dark when no one sees me. I did not lose ‘who I really was’. No one can destroy your character except for yourself.

What is my purpose?

I have had wonderful years of ministry traveling ….singing….teaching etc. and then a season came into my life and I wondered ‘What is my Purpose” And I have struggled with the ‘call’ on my life that still burns inside and had to acknowledge the platform is gone. I have questioned ‘What is my Purpose’, is God done with me? ‘Will He throw away all that I have gleaned from study and lessons learned in life? These are heart felt questions that I often seek an answer to. At times God will give a piece of the puzzle and this morning I heard John Maxwell preach, he said, ‘The Secret of your success is dependent on your daily agenda’. One of the examples he gave, in short form, we make a New Year’s resolution and we keep it for a couple of weeks and then we drop off. But the success of that decision is daily maintaining it.

My favorite verse for over 40 years is, ‘In Him I live and move and have my being’. if I am in Him , loving, fellowshipping with Him, basking in His presence and doing what He asks me to do I have to believe that I am exactly where He wants me. Knowing that my daily success is dependent on His agenda in my life and obedience to ‘thus says the Lord’
My answer to 'Who am I'? is not what I do but the character that I have.
'What is my purpose'? It is fellowship with Him, Obedience to His Word and telling others about Jesus on whatever platform He has for my life.

One thing I desire...

David's words in Psalm 27:4

One thing I have desired of the Lord,

That will I seek:

That I may dwell in the house of the LORD

All the days of my life.

To behold the beauty of the LORD,

And to inquire(meditate) in His temple.

He says, 'One thing I have desired of the Lord'. And then he goes on to list three things, Seek, dwell, and behold, Young's literal translation says, 'I asked of Jehovah'; the Message says, 'I'm asking God for one thing'; the World English Bible says 'I have asked of Yahweh'. When he says I am desiring of the Lord it means he is inquiring, requesting, consulting, begging and wishing for those 3 things. He says I am going to SEEK which means, I will search out (by any method, specifically in worship or prayer); it implies to strive after, ask or beg.

Can you hear the deep longing within him. To sit in His presence in worship and prayer.

His desire is to DWELL in the house of the Lord all the days of his life. It means to remain, seat yourself or tarry. Which speaks to me that it takes time. A place that is set aside where Jehovah God will meet him.

What is his purpose? He says to BEHOLD the beauty of the Lord. David is saying I am going to contemplate, (with shades of meaning including to study, consider, speculate, muse, think over or mull over) His glorious majesty, His wisdom, His Holiness, His Justice, His mercy and truth.

This psalmist of Israel sets his heart to SEEK, DWELL AND BEHOLD the Lord. And again he uses the word SEEK which means to plough, break forth, search. An Invitation is there for us to :

• Come before His presence with singing..
• Enter into His gates with thanksgiving ..
• And into His courts with Praise.
• Deep calls unto deep....
• You will be hidden and placed high on a rock...a place that is inaccessible to the enemy.

Vs 5. For in the time of trouble

He shall hide me in His pavilion;

In the secret place of His tabernacle

He shall hide me;

He shall me me high upon a rock.

Caleb's Story

I am sharing the story of my dear friend Betty's grandson who has been diagnosed with cancer. He is the son of Pastor’s Jeff and Julie(her daughter), Sister Maggie, and Brothers, Zachary and Spencer. They live in Maryland. A healthy 4 year old running and playing and having fun and the next day diagnosed with a life threatening disease called cancer. I will only hit the highlights of the story. My purpose is that you would pray for healing.

Caleb’s story begins in Dec. 2007 when blood was found in his urine, His pediatrician did a urinalysis and blood work and nothing showed up and was dismissed as a virus. On May 15, 2008 His mom Julie, took Caleb in for what was a routine check for STREP. A CNP examined him thoroughly and felt a mass and he was sent for tests and a malignant tumor was found in his kidney. He faced stage 3 cancer which had spread also to the tissue and blood vessels. He had the surgery to remove the kidney and would continue with radiation and 27 weeks of chemo.

In the midst of this his mom tells a story. His dad, Jeff, tells Caleb every night before bed that they are best buddies forever. Lying in bed with his dad one night, Caleb said, “Daddy, when we get to heaven will we still be best buddies?” “Of course”, Jeff assured him that they would. Then another night Caleb was rubbing his dad’s head and he said, “Don’t worry daddy, when I’m done chemo our hair will grow back. How precious this little one. It makes you wonder what goes through a child’s thoughts.

UPDATE:
SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 13, 2008
Caleb had follow up tests this past week and he is tumor free but he still faces the last part of his chemo treatment every 3 weeks.

His mom’s words:
"My son has cancer and I never would have dreamed we would be living this out. Nobody does, I guess. The word HOPE has a new and deeper meaning for parents of children with cancer. I look at Caleb through different eyes now. I spend more time just watching him play or even sleep. Not because I have a sense of doom about him but because I am so much more aware of what I would lose if he were not with us.And so now we go for chemo every three weeks in D.C. "

Isaiah 53:5 He was wounded for our transgressions.

He was bruised for our iniquities;

The chastisment for our peace was up Him.

And by His stripes we are healed.

Stand with this family as they fight this battle with their son over cancer.

His Peace

We camped this week in Skowhegan and this was the scene a stone's throw from our camping spot. So quiet and serene. When your eyes behold the splendour of His beauty. It will have an effect on you and quiet you within just to realize He speaks to nature and it is done! A friend loves at all times. When I think of friendship it is #1 True #2 Consistent #3 Trustworthy #4 Reliable #5 Loves without reservation. You could probably add some other adjectives. We have so many people that are truly our friends all over the country. Two came to visit at camp. Arnold and Ann with his new toy since retiring. Ann heads the Maine chapter of Newborns in Need, a National organization to help needy moms. Precious friends we have known for a long time and who love Jesus. Below is Max, our boston terrier who accompanied us on the trip. He was not happy at this point. He is never leashed. He is great to take along as he does not bark and minds very well. Hubby could not go without him even though I offered to pay for the kennel. (smile)
It was a relaxing time for us. God gives his children rest and refreshing in the midst of life. I tell young couples they need to take time to spend with each other as there will come a time when it is just the two of them. The children will be gone and they need to 'know' each other. If not, there is danger in going their own separate ways and travelling their own individual paths involved in their interests alone. Life goes fast and the seed sown in younger years will grow. Question to ask oneself. Have I taken time for my partner? Or is life slipping away and I am on such a fast slide that I cannot slow down or get off. Something to think about.

There is a river whose streams shall make glad the city of God.

The holy place of the tabernacle of the Most High,

God is in the midst of her, she shall not be moved;..Psalm 46:4-5a

God is Faithful

I read on Sunday, Psm 37:3b 'Feed on His faithfulness'. The bible says to meditate on the Word of God. It is like the cow that chews her cud. Chewing the Word over and over again...then thinking about what it means to feed. A few ideas are -
1. We must avail yourself to where the food is.
2. We must choose to partake.
3. It becomes a part of us and needs to be digested.
4. It will change us within.
So I need to avail myself, I need to choose to partake and allow His faithfulness to be a part of me so I can digest and let it change me.
I began to 'Feed on His faithfulness' to me over the years. Thinking about salvation at age 9, faithfulness of His provision, faithfulness to deliver, faithfulness to protect me, faithfulness to lead me each step, faithfulness as Jehovah Ropheka my healer, faithfulness as a friend, faithfulness as Father, faithfulness as a counselor and on and on. Feeding on His faithfulness tends to get me excited just to think He cares and is concerned for every detail of my life.

I received an email from a former neighbor, Nancy, who lives in North Carolina. She lost her husband in August, 2003. She said the song 'Great is thy Faithfulness' has ministered to her since his death.

Great is thy Faithfulness, Great is thy Faithfulness

Morning by morning new mercies I see.

All I have needed thy hand hath provided.

Great is thy faithfulness. Lord unto me.

David stated in Psalm 89:1...With my mouth I will make known your faithfulness.

Lam. 3:22-22-23 'Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed,

Because His compassion fails not. They are new every morning; Great is thy Faithfulness.'

There are times we think about the negative things that are happening around us and not the Faithfulness of God and all the wonderful things that are ours. FEED ON HIS FAITHFULNESS TO YOU this day!

God Cares – God Leads – God Sees

Kennebec River in Maine

My hubby and I went for a ride…it was a beautiful sunny day and we had no particular direction but ended up at the boat wharf along the Kennebec River in Richmond. I snapped a picture (notice the big boat to the right) and continued to look up and down the river at the activity. We watched as this big boat made its way in to tie up at the wharf. A young woman was running with rope in tow and she asked about tying it up at the end but the man stated, to go to the end and that was where we were standing. A small child around 2 was trying to put her foot over the boat and onto the wharf and no one was paying attention. I hollered, ‘she is going to fall’ and that brought everyone to attention. She would have fallen between the boat and wharf into a very swift current that goes into the ocean eventually. And it would have been a very serious tragedy. BUT GOD!!

We wonder if God leads... God cares …God sees.... I believe in destiny and that God was watching over that little one and her family yesterday. It was a last minute decision to go for a ride. We had never been to that wharf. We do not usually get out of the car but just sit and look at a river. But this day, I decided to get a picture. This was God’s divine appointment for a little child and saving that family from loss.


God Cares:I Peter 5: 7 Cast all your care on Him because He cares for you.
He Leads: Psalm 23:3a He leads me beside quiet (still) waters.
He Sees: ! Peter 3:12a The eyes of the Lord are on the righteous

Will you be a tool of divine appointment for someone's today or will someone be put in your path to help you? We say, 'Yes Lord your will be done in our lives'.